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1 Edgecombe Court, Moorabbin, VIC 3189

Robots in Disguise!

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“Transformers: Robots in Disguise!” For those unfamiliar with the franchise of animated television shows, toys, and Michael Bay movies (not to mention various other bits and pieces of tie-in merchandise), the concept revolves around giant armoured robots who transform into various vehicles like trucks, cars, and even trains when they’re not busy fighting.

But does anybody ever stop to think about what it does to the vehicles to spend a substantial portion of their time as humungous mecha? I mean, normal vehicles require an annoying amount of attention and care anyway. You have to change oil, fill them up with petrol, replace the brake pads, and check the tyre pressure. Now what if your vehicle occasionally turned into a huge robot and got beat up by other robots? When tyres are doubling as the biceps of some mechatronic muscle man, how does that affect their pressure? Do the Autobots head for the nearest petrol station first thing after a fight?

It strikes me that one thing they could really use – if they don’t have already, and since the franchise started out in the 80s, they probably didn’t have it originally – is a tyre pressure monitoring system. Especially since if you’re a sentient robot described as a truck, you don’t always have a human around to measure your tyre pressure. But if you had a TPMS installed and wired up to your computer brain, you’d know right when your tyre pressure was getting low – and if you need to drive like hell to save the world, then a flat tyre is a serious problem. It occurs to me that the transformers should all be fitted with state-of-the-art tyre sensors like the ones from Safety Dave if they really want to stay in shape between duking it out in steely brawls. Otherwise, pretty soon their tyres will wear out and they won’t be able to defend the planet anymore.